floatingleaf: (prison)
[personal profile] floatingleaf
Remember how I went to see my dentist about 3 months ago, and he said to come back later, when that old crown I wanted to remove has loosened a little more, so it will be easier to take it out?... Well, it wasn't feeling any different than before, so I didn't want to make another appointment, only to be told to "come back later" again. And it didn't really bother me much, as long as I remembered to favor the other side of my mouth while I ate. However, last Friday, after my meeting with the career coach, I had lunch at this fancy organic place right by her office, and I picked a very crunchy salad, with lots of crispy fresh greens and nuts in it. And I totally forgot to be careful with that sore tooth. Funnily enough, I was perfectly fine while I ate - no discomfort at all. However, on the train on my way back, I suddenly noticed a dull ache encompassing the entire left side of my jaw. By the time I got home, it had intensified to a full-blown state of agony. I popped an Ibuprofen right away, but it took a while before the pain went down to a tolerable level. And as soon as the pill stopped working, it was back.:/ It didn't really subside until the next morning, after hours of not eating anything or moving my jaw in any way. But as soon as I attempted to have some breakfast, there it was again. No matter how careful I was to use only the right side of my mouth. This situation continued for much of Saturday - I needed an Ibuprofen first, before I could handle a meal. As you may imagine, it had quite the dampening effect on my appetite. Today has been slightly better - possibly because I have mastered the art of eating with excruciating slowness, and not letting even the tiniest morsel get anywhere near the left side of my mouth. But I can still feel the dull throbbing ache in the background. Interestingly, though, it doesn't seem to be coming from that loose old crown on the upper left side. I have ANOTHER old crown on the lower left side, and I think this might be the tooth currently clamoring for attention. Or possibly the last molar at the back, which also contains an old filling. When the entire side of your jaw seems to hurt, it can be difficult to pinpoint the exact cause. It might just as well be all of them at once. The more the merrier. Especially since I can't see a dentist anytime soon, because my health insurance has just run out.

Clearly, I did not have enough problems. What is this, dear universe? Some sort of endurance test, perhaps? I swear that as soon as I start to think: "OK, perhaps I can handle this", I get another stumbling block thrown my way. It really makes me wonder if there is some "divine purpose" to it that I am unaware of. Or divine mockery, perhaps. Because I was arrogant enough to think that a proper diet will eliminate any and all health-related problems from my life. Or that some self-help techniques discovered accidentally on the internet will make me immune to anxiety and/or depression. BWAHAHAHA, says the universe. Try as hard as you like. You're still screwed over in the end.

And this is the state of mind in which I am supposed to practice "video interviewing" for jobs, and make myself sound calm and confident. Yeah, right. Sample question: "Why should we hire you?" Sample answer: "Because I need dental insurance, ASAP". Do I get points for disarming honesty here? Nope? Yeah, thought as much. *sigh*

Btw, I checked out the Obamacare website today, and it looks like I MIGHT be eligible for lower monthly premiums than what I would pay under COBRA - but even if I apply now, the new policy won't become effective until July 1st. COBRA might be effective immediately - but I still haven't received all the necessary paperwork to apply for it. They are supposed to send it to me "within two weeks" from the final day of employer-sponsored coverage - which was May 31st. Not sure why they can't do it earlier, since the actual date of my lay-off was two weeks before that, and it was already obvious at that point when the coverage was going to end. But why make people's lives easier by sending it ahead of time? That's not what bureaucracy is all about.:/

Well, at least if I am forced to eat as little as possible over the next few weeks, to avoid massive dental torture, I will surely lose some weight (I think I have already, judging by the fit of certain clothes). That's the positive approach. Do I get points for that? Looking on the bright side, like those cheery crucified martyrs from Monty Python. Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition, but it comes and screws you over all the same.

Yeah, on some level it's almost funny. At least until I realize that this is actually my life right now, not some sarcastic British comedy show. *sigh*
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