Floating Leaf (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
floatingleaf) wrote2012-12-13 10:45 pm
floatingleaf) wrote2012-12-13 10:45 pm
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I am here, but my inner hard drive needs a reboot :/
As you may have noticed, my brain hasn't been very cooperative in the posting department of late. It's not that I have nothing to talk about - it's more that on most evenings, formulating coherent sentences seems too much of an effort. I read my flist every day - I just don't have the wherewithall to comment much (if any). It's as though I have become even more introverted, if at all possible (now that's a troubling thought, if I ever had one... LOL). I am also in a strange physical/mental state resulting - most likely - from the hormonal changes my body seems to be going through. In other words, my period should have started about 5 days ago, but there's no hint of it so far - except for this really weird sort-of-PMS that isn't really a PMS as I used to know it. I mean, it sort of comes and goes in waves. One moment I feel like OMG, it's gonna start any minute now - and then it completely goes away, and I am perfectly fine for the next few hours. And then it comes back. I also seem to be filled with a weird kind of nervous energy that resembles a typical PMS - except it also comes and goes at random. It mostly carries me through the day, so that I tend to walk VERY briskly in the mornings, tap my foot to the music in my headphones all through he commute and act very businesslike and efficient at work - but towards evening it usually leaves me in a rush, like air from a pierced balloon, and I am suddenly very lethargic, dragging my feet, wanting nothing but my dinner, heating pad and a book. And bed. Unfortunately, though, once I actually go to bed, the nervous energy seems to come back, making me toss and turn, wake up every hour or two, feel antsy and itchy and have strange, disturbing thoughts. Doesn't that sound like typical symptoms of menopause?... There are very few women on my flist who are actually OLDER than me and could possibly enlighten me on the topic, and I don't want to "call anyone out", so to speak - but any thoughts would be welcome...
Luckily for me, though, I have some time off scheduled in the next two weeks. I have to work Wednesday through Friday after Christmas AND on New Year's Eve, because three other people on my team (including the boss) had already requested those days, and SOMEONE needs to be in the office, after all (note to self: next year, better start planning your December vacation time around August...). But thanks to that, I am off next Monday AND Friday, as well as Christmas Eve - and on the days I do work, I can leave a little earlier than usual, since I still had a few odd PTO hours left to use. I also left earlier today, which was nice. Tomorrow is our annual holiday lunch for the entire company, and they are letting us go home early anyway.:) So I should be able to "take it easy" over the next few days, and hopefully catch up on sleep. Which might make my brain a little more capable of intelligent discourse.;)
Btw, I do need to adjust my sleeping pattern to something manageable; namely, it would really help if I could drag my ass to bed by 11 p.m. on a daily basis. I know this is a recurring topic in this journal, which clearly shows I haven't managed to accomplish it so far - but the older I get, the more difficult it becomes to function on less than 7 hours of sleep; and I ALWAYS wake up during the night, at least once, so if I want to make sure I do get the 7 hours, I need to plan for 8. This is easier said than done, obviously, since it reduces the already very skimpy amount of time I have to myself on a typical evening; but unless it is done, I will basically be a permanently lethargic zombie-like creature who lacks the brainpower for a simple LJ comment... let alone a post, an email or anything equally demanding. (/sarcasm) Speaking of which... yes, it's almost 10:30, and my ability to form coherent sentences is shutting down anyway. Meh. Talk to you later then. *shuts up*
Luckily for me, though, I have some time off scheduled in the next two weeks. I have to work Wednesday through Friday after Christmas AND on New Year's Eve, because three other people on my team (including the boss) had already requested those days, and SOMEONE needs to be in the office, after all (note to self: next year, better start planning your December vacation time around August...). But thanks to that, I am off next Monday AND Friday, as well as Christmas Eve - and on the days I do work, I can leave a little earlier than usual, since I still had a few odd PTO hours left to use. I also left earlier today, which was nice. Tomorrow is our annual holiday lunch for the entire company, and they are letting us go home early anyway.:) So I should be able to "take it easy" over the next few days, and hopefully catch up on sleep. Which might make my brain a little more capable of intelligent discourse.;)
Btw, I do need to adjust my sleeping pattern to something manageable; namely, it would really help if I could drag my ass to bed by 11 p.m. on a daily basis. I know this is a recurring topic in this journal, which clearly shows I haven't managed to accomplish it so far - but the older I get, the more difficult it becomes to function on less than 7 hours of sleep; and I ALWAYS wake up during the night, at least once, so if I want to make sure I do get the 7 hours, I need to plan for 8. This is easier said than done, obviously, since it reduces the already very skimpy amount of time I have to myself on a typical evening; but unless it is done, I will basically be a permanently lethargic zombie-like creature who lacks the brainpower for a simple LJ comment... let alone a post, an email or anything equally demanding. (/sarcasm) Speaking of which... yes, it's almost 10:30, and my ability to form coherent sentences is shutting down anyway. Meh. Talk to you later then. *shuts up*
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