one big load of crap

Oh dear. I feel so SIIICK. The throat thing is definitely an infection. I keep downing mug after mug of hot, soothing liquids, and I still have a desert in my mouth. Even sore throat lozenges don't help much - at least not for a long time. And I think I have a fever. I just came out of the bath, and I feel sweaty all over again, despite the air conditioner blowing freezing air on me (which is probably not a good idea, but it does bring some relief). I'm thinking I might have to call in sick to work tomorrow. Probably should see a doctor and get some prescription meds too. And they only just sent me the bill for the previous visit. Crap. I so didn't need that right now.

As if that wasn't enough, I realized this morning that I probably have sleep apnea. I had been reading carynita's posts about her own struggle with this weird medical condition, and some parts of it just sounded too damn familiar. So I started paying very close attention to my own breathing pattern when I'm on the verge of falling asleep, or just after waking up - and sure enough, I seem to stop breathing from time to time, only to jerk awake seconds later while inhaling a huge gulp of air. And sometimes I feel my heart start beating very rapidly during the night, for no apparent reason (lack of oxygen, maybe?...). So that could be why it usually takes ages for me to fall asleep, no matter how exhausted I am. And why I sometimes wake up in the morning not feeling rested at all. Or why even very quiet noises can wake me. Because I hardly ever get to the deep sleep phase. The one where you don't even dream any more. I always dream, usually a few different dreams a night - because that's how often I wake up. And sometimes the dreams are restless and disturbing, for no apparent 'real life' reason, and I wake up all tense and breathless too. Could it be because I am actually choking in my sleep?... Jeez. I think this is all too much. *cries*

And yes, I did go see POTC:AWE with Akasha yesterday, and it was fun, even though I was feeling woozy, and had to take a bathroom break during the movie (which means, according to Akasha, that I have to go see it again :D). But I don't think I have the energy to say anything more right now. I need to go lie down. Have a rented movie to watch too, and might just as well do it tonight - since I don't seem capable of much else anyway. *sigh*