like my life is slipping away, while I'm stuck barely making a living doing something that's merely tolerable - a lesser evil (all my jobs so far were exactly that - except for those that were the greater evil, LOL). And I feel like I'm too old to keep doing that anymore. But I don't see a way out that doesn't involve getting way out of my depth, so to speak. It's like a trap, a vicious circle that will roll with me down the hill, all the way to the grave. Because time is merciless and won't wait till I get my act together. So here I am, endlessly wavering between wistfulness, fear and regret...
i hear you, i do. that feeling is often in the back of my head, and sometimes in the foreground, and it's debilitating at times. i don't have the solution.
do you know slashfairy? ever heard of Despair Work by Joanna Macy? slashfairy has transcribed and posted it at her journal. it doesn't (seemingly) address exactly the junk we're talking about here, but i find it helpful at times, i really do. just a thought. xo
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Date: 2008-08-05 05:53 am (UTC)i hear you, i do. that feeling is often in the back of my head, and sometimes in the foreground, and it's debilitating at times. i don't have the solution.
do you know