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Sunday rant
Apr. 5th, 2009 08:15 pmIt's snowing outside. Seriously. Light, wet snow that melts as soon as it touches the ground, but still... It's April, for heaven's sake. Cut it out already, Winter, and kindly get lost. We've had more than enough, thank you very much. *feels indignant*
I've been sooooo lazy today. I somehow never got dressed, because by the time I made it out of my 'morning' bath, it was already late afternoon, so I figured by then there was no point. I had thought I might invite a friend over for a movie or something... but then I would have to get dressed, wouldn't I?... So I didn't. It just seemed like too much effort. Pathetic, isn't it?... But there are days (increasingly frequent, I'm afraid) when making any sort of human contact - even picking up the phone - seems to require more energy than I can muster. It's not that I don't want to see anyone - it's just that I don't feel up to it somehow. It's hard to explain... it's one of those little things about me that most extrovert or socially active people could never understand. There are days when my brain just settles into the silence of my empty apartment, and written word seems the only way I can possibly communicate with the outside world. Someone else's call might shake me out of it - but I will not be the one to break the silence. And because I hardly ever call people, I suppose at some point they might entirely stop calling me as well. Which has almost happened already, btw.
In other exciting news, I just don't see a way out of my current financial predicament. I mean, I am sort of making ends meet, but barely, and I don't see how that will ever change. Even if I do get the standard 2% salary raise next year (the one that was cancelled for this year, due to the shitty economic situation), it will barely cover the unavoidable increases in rent or utility bills. Or NOT cover them, more likely. I mean, 2% of my salary is less than $20 per paycheck. Not even worth mentioning, is it? So it would be extremely naive to expect that things will get better once this unlucky year is over. They might, in fact, get worse. I might still lose the meager remnants of my savings, without ever spending a penny on anything outside the basic grocery list. *sigh*
( Read more... )
I've been sooooo lazy today. I somehow never got dressed, because by the time I made it out of my 'morning' bath, it was already late afternoon, so I figured by then there was no point. I had thought I might invite a friend over for a movie or something... but then I would have to get dressed, wouldn't I?... So I didn't. It just seemed like too much effort. Pathetic, isn't it?... But there are days (increasingly frequent, I'm afraid) when making any sort of human contact - even picking up the phone - seems to require more energy than I can muster. It's not that I don't want to see anyone - it's just that I don't feel up to it somehow. It's hard to explain... it's one of those little things about me that most extrovert or socially active people could never understand. There are days when my brain just settles into the silence of my empty apartment, and written word seems the only way I can possibly communicate with the outside world. Someone else's call might shake me out of it - but I will not be the one to break the silence. And because I hardly ever call people, I suppose at some point they might entirely stop calling me as well. Which has almost happened already, btw.
In other exciting news, I just don't see a way out of my current financial predicament. I mean, I am sort of making ends meet, but barely, and I don't see how that will ever change. Even if I do get the standard 2% salary raise next year (the one that was cancelled for this year, due to the shitty economic situation), it will barely cover the unavoidable increases in rent or utility bills. Or NOT cover them, more likely. I mean, 2% of my salary is less than $20 per paycheck. Not even worth mentioning, is it? So it would be extremely naive to expect that things will get better once this unlucky year is over. They might, in fact, get worse. I might still lose the meager remnants of my savings, without ever spending a penny on anything outside the basic grocery list. *sigh*
( Read more... )
