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meathiel and dissonant_dream for the blue dragons!... They're cute.;)
Winter is making its final (hopefully...) stand this weekend, and after trudging through frozen snow for most of the day running errands my legs feel weak and achy. Luckily I don't have to go anywhere tomorrow...
No other personal news to share... but there is something I've been thinking about a lot for the past few days. See, I discovered this blog on intersexuality. Also known as hermaphroditism - but the latter term is seen by some people it refers to as controversial. Anyway... the essence of the matter is that our (Western) culture tells us everyone is born either male or female, except for some extremely rare "birth defect" cases that require immediate corrective surgery. According to this blog, 1 in 200 people is born with some kind of "intermediate" sexual configuration (purely biologically speaking, of course - the concept of gender identification doesn't even enter the picture at this point, since of course a newborn cannot "identify" with anything). One in two hundred. That's not so extremely rare at all. That's 0.5% of the population. Except it isn't public knowledge, because the medical establishment seems extremely concerned with enforcing the belief that only two sexes/genders exist in nature, and that whenever someone is born looking like neither, "nature" made a mistake and they - the doctors - need to fix it. It's not particularly difficult to see the motive behind such enforcement; the more clearly we define and separate the two sexes, the easier it becomes to establish the "superiority" of one over the other. But, like it or not, this isn't how nature works. Nature is fluid and capricious, and doesn't care for neatly labelled boxes that people create to more easily "manage" our reality. And, in nature, sex - like gender - is a spectrum. Quite literally so. There are various forms of hermaphroditism in existence, but they do not include - contrary to popular myth - individuals possessing BOTH a penis and a vagina. They include a number of combinations of internal and external reproductive organs that are either typically female, typically male, or somewhere in between (with varying degrees of "in between"). In fact, in fetal form everybody's genitals are "somewhere in between"; or, in other words, their basic form has the capability to develop into either male or female - and sometimes the different components do not go in the same direction. It is all very clearly and accessibly explained in the following post - with the help of hand-drawn diagrams (no photos of random people's genitalia - just in case you're wondering, LOL):
http://intersexroadshow.blogspot.com/2011_04_01_archive.html
The post also talks about how doctors make arbitrary decisions concerning the sex of babies born with atypical genitalia, and often perform surgery that is painful, traumatizing and can lead to lifelong complications; and how all that happens long before the child in question has a chance to grow up and decide what gender they identify with (if any). This happens because we, as a culture, believe that everyone needs to conform to a set of clear-cut definititions that are sometimes quite far removed from the messy reality of LIFE. Often the people supporting the validity of those definitions say: "Imagine how tough life is going to be for this kid if we let them grow up neither male nor female." True. But who makes life tough for them? We do. We, the society. So how about we change our thinking instead of putting infants through traumatizing surgery without even knowing if we're trying to transform them into the "correct" gender? (an example from the blog: a baby born with a uterus AND a penis is usually considered by doctors to be female, so they remove the penis; however, should the baby then grow up to identify as a boy, the whole thing turns into a pointless tragedy)
And this is merely the tip of the iceberg, as far as issues related to the topic are concerned. Biological sex is one thing; gender is another. Also a spectrum, and not necessarily paralell to the sex spectrum. And then we have sexual orientation. How do we even talk about it in relation to intersex people?... When someone is neither male nor female, then terms like "heterosexual" and "homosexual" lose all meaning. Only "asexual" and "pansexual" would still be valid, I suppose.
Anyway... I find all this absolutely fascinating, as well as important, and so I couldn't stop myself from sharing.:) There are so many taboo topics, not discussed in "polite society" (polite society being, by definition, sexist, bigoted and otherwise oppressive, imo). But, thanks to whatever deity up there that gives a damn, we have the internet.:D
And to put my own private spin on it: the blog clarified one orientation-related thing for me. I've been getting used to calling myself a bi-romantic demisexual; as in, romantically attracted to both genders (and sexually only to people I have romantic feelings for, regardless of gender). However, if I take into account the fact that there are more than two genders, and that my romantic feelings, in general, have absolutely nothing to do with people's genitals - then I have to call myself pan-romantic. Seriously - if I loved someone, I couldn't care less if their junk looked like a "special case" from a medical journal; I would still want them, and they would be beautiful to me. And if I didn't love them, I wouldn't want to have sex with them anyway - even if they looked like a Playboy/Playgirl centerpiece, LOL. So, pan-romantic demisexual it is. *nods* ;)
meathiel and dissonant_dream for the blue dragons!... They're cute.;)Winter is making its final (hopefully...) stand this weekend, and after trudging through frozen snow for most of the day running errands my legs feel weak and achy. Luckily I don't have to go anywhere tomorrow...
No other personal news to share... but there is something I've been thinking about a lot for the past few days. See, I discovered this blog on intersexuality. Also known as hermaphroditism - but the latter term is seen by some people it refers to as controversial. Anyway... the essence of the matter is that our (Western) culture tells us everyone is born either male or female, except for some extremely rare "birth defect" cases that require immediate corrective surgery. According to this blog, 1 in 200 people is born with some kind of "intermediate" sexual configuration (purely biologically speaking, of course - the concept of gender identification doesn't even enter the picture at this point, since of course a newborn cannot "identify" with anything). One in two hundred. That's not so extremely rare at all. That's 0.5% of the population. Except it isn't public knowledge, because the medical establishment seems extremely concerned with enforcing the belief that only two sexes/genders exist in nature, and that whenever someone is born looking like neither, "nature" made a mistake and they - the doctors - need to fix it. It's not particularly difficult to see the motive behind such enforcement; the more clearly we define and separate the two sexes, the easier it becomes to establish the "superiority" of one over the other. But, like it or not, this isn't how nature works. Nature is fluid and capricious, and doesn't care for neatly labelled boxes that people create to more easily "manage" our reality. And, in nature, sex - like gender - is a spectrum. Quite literally so. There are various forms of hermaphroditism in existence, but they do not include - contrary to popular myth - individuals possessing BOTH a penis and a vagina. They include a number of combinations of internal and external reproductive organs that are either typically female, typically male, or somewhere in between (with varying degrees of "in between"). In fact, in fetal form everybody's genitals are "somewhere in between"; or, in other words, their basic form has the capability to develop into either male or female - and sometimes the different components do not go in the same direction. It is all very clearly and accessibly explained in the following post - with the help of hand-drawn diagrams (no photos of random people's genitalia - just in case you're wondering, LOL):
http://intersexroadshow.blogspot.com/2011_04_01_archive.html
The post also talks about how doctors make arbitrary decisions concerning the sex of babies born with atypical genitalia, and often perform surgery that is painful, traumatizing and can lead to lifelong complications; and how all that happens long before the child in question has a chance to grow up and decide what gender they identify with (if any). This happens because we, as a culture, believe that everyone needs to conform to a set of clear-cut definititions that are sometimes quite far removed from the messy reality of LIFE. Often the people supporting the validity of those definitions say: "Imagine how tough life is going to be for this kid if we let them grow up neither male nor female." True. But who makes life tough for them? We do. We, the society. So how about we change our thinking instead of putting infants through traumatizing surgery without even knowing if we're trying to transform them into the "correct" gender? (an example from the blog: a baby born with a uterus AND a penis is usually considered by doctors to be female, so they remove the penis; however, should the baby then grow up to identify as a boy, the whole thing turns into a pointless tragedy)
And this is merely the tip of the iceberg, as far as issues related to the topic are concerned. Biological sex is one thing; gender is another. Also a spectrum, and not necessarily paralell to the sex spectrum. And then we have sexual orientation. How do we even talk about it in relation to intersex people?... When someone is neither male nor female, then terms like "heterosexual" and "homosexual" lose all meaning. Only "asexual" and "pansexual" would still be valid, I suppose.
Anyway... I find all this absolutely fascinating, as well as important, and so I couldn't stop myself from sharing.:) There are so many taboo topics, not discussed in "polite society" (polite society being, by definition, sexist, bigoted and otherwise oppressive, imo). But, thanks to whatever deity up there that gives a damn, we have the internet.:D
And to put my own private spin on it: the blog clarified one orientation-related thing for me. I've been getting used to calling myself a bi-romantic demisexual; as in, romantically attracted to both genders (and sexually only to people I have romantic feelings for, regardless of gender). However, if I take into account the fact that there are more than two genders, and that my romantic feelings, in general, have absolutely nothing to do with people's genitals - then I have to call myself pan-romantic. Seriously - if I loved someone, I couldn't care less if their junk looked like a "special case" from a medical journal; I would still want them, and they would be beautiful to me. And if I didn't love them, I wouldn't want to have sex with them anyway - even if they looked like a Playboy/Playgirl centerpiece, LOL. So, pan-romantic demisexual it is. *nods* ;)
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(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-26 06:54 am (UTC)I think it is really horrible how everything is so dualistic in this world. And how is it even possible that doctors & parents can make such decisions for the babies instead of accepting there's much more to sex & gender than just the two conventionally accepted concepts.
For quite a long time now I've felt quite lost in the world divided into two categories; men & women/masculine & feminine. I'm truly grateful that shamanism (& mystic) as a spiritual path & worldview regard the gender flexibility as a positive, accepted thing. It has really helped a lot.
I used to be very feminine in my early 20's and I was raised as a girl but I always felt something was missing. These days I do not want to define my gender at all because I feel I just do not really fit in any one definition. There are times when I feel I'm actually a gay man with a female body and it is quite confusing but on the other hand I also feel attracted to women as a woman. I have so many different sides of me that I could never really define myself as bi-anything. I've come to a conclusion that I fall in love with people, not genders. And I've always felt attracted & fascinated by androgynous people and people who are hard to define in terms of gender. Maybe because deep inside that's how I've always felt as well.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-27 02:44 am (UTC)Anyway... sexual orientation is fluid for me as well; I identified as a lesbian for years, but sometimes it felt like I needed a different label that simply didn't exist. "Demisexual" sounds perfect for now, but who knows about the future?... *smirk*
I've always been very feminine in real life... but I've had dreams and fantasies where I was a gay man, and I get a hell of a kick out of m/m slash.:D I am also fascinated by all sorts of people who cross boundaries, and I strongly identify with fictional characters who are seen as outsiders, for any number of reasons. For me, the "out of place" feeling didn't have anything to do with gender - it was more of a personality thing, as well as lack of cultural acceptance in a small, close-minded community (everyone around me was Catholic where I grew up, and I wasn't) - but I think it helped me become more open-minded and respectful of other "misfits" I encountered later in life. I always get a strong emotional reaction when I see someone given a cold shoulder for being "different"...
And I find it so ironic that many "primitive" cultures were far more accepting of the natural variety in human expression than our so-called "civilized" modern world... *sigh*
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-27 10:46 am (UTC)I've also been very feminine most of my life until the last a couple of years when I've started to look and feel a bit more androgynous. And I also love M/M slash the best. I do enjoy lesbian love stories as well but something about M/M slash just gets to me like nothing else does. I can relate to gay characters as well as those who are in between or undefinable. Like Fool in Robin Hobb's books. He's the most amazing character I've ever encountered in any literature. <3
I like misfits too, and the shy, reserved antiheroes who find their strength as they are. <3
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-28 02:15 am (UTC)the shy, reserved antiheroes who find their strength as they are
OMG YES. Literature needs more of those. *nods*
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-28 08:03 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-27 02:48 pm (UTC)I must say that, ever since, I've thought about it whenever I see the options of "Male or female" given on forms or the online surveys I do. I always think how excluded intersex or genderqueer people must feel faced with those stark two options.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-28 02:30 am (UTC)I've done some online surveys too, and every once in a great while a third option would come up that said "prefer not to answer". But you know what that reminded me of? "Don't ask, don't tell". What if someone does want to answer, but there simply isn't a correct option for them? In that case, the survey authors are sending a clear message of "we don't want to know too much about it".:/
Yeah, even such a simple thing as a stupid online survey can be a lesson in privilege and oppression...
(no subject)
Date: 2012-03-02 11:01 am (UTC)I read a book about Lemuria these days which stated that there were no male and female in the beginning. Also old sayings deal a lot with this. There is more in this and not only the dualisitc point of view humans do have now.
Well, I do identify as a woman in this life and I love men, but I know there is more than this.