a nice quiz and a boring, whiny update

[floatingleaf]

Snagged from rainweaver13:

Your Score: Orpheus

0% Extroversion, 80% Intuition, 100% Emotiveness, 100% Perceptiveness

You are an artist, an aesthete, a sensitive, and someone who has never really let go of that childlike innocence. To you, all of life has a sense of wonder in it, and the story of Orpheus was written about someone just like you.

When the Argo passed the island of the Sirens, Orpheus played a song more beautiful than the Sirens to prevent the crew from becoming enticed. When his wife died, he ventured into the underworld to charm Hades but, in his naivete, he looked back becoming trapped there.

You can capture your unique world view and relate it to others with the skill of a master storyteller. Your sensitivity and creativity make you a treasure to the human race, but your thin-skinned nature and innocence can cause you a lot of disenchantment and pain. What's doubly unfortunate is that, if you try to lose those traits, you never will, and everyone will be able to tell that you're putting up an artificial shell to prevent yourself from being hurt.

Famous people like you: Hemingway, Shakespeare, Mr. Rogers, Melville, Nick Tosches
Stay clear of: Icarus, Hermes, Atlas

Link: The Greek Mythology Personality Test written by Aleph_Nine on OkCupid, home of the The Dating Persona Test

It appears that my sleep study was just a grand waste of time and money. Why? Because I don't think I actually fell asleep once during the whole thing. The nice young nurse who was in charge says that I did, eventually, and that during that short time 'everything seemed fine'. As in, no irregular breathing, no snores etc. BUT: 1) I don't actually remember falling asleep or 'waking up' at all; 2) I was so nervous and tense throughout the night that I couldn't possibly have relaxed enough to give any indication of what happens when I am in REAL resting mode; 3) while sleeping or dozing off at home, I wake myself up with snores nearly every night. The fact that it didn't happen once while I was under observation is just grotesquely ironic, imo. But, by definition, the breathing problems happen when your throat muscles RELAX during sleep, right? And I don't think there was one single relaxed muscle in my body that night, to be honest. Just being there, stuck up with all those wires, knowing that someone is watching my every tiniest movement on a computer screen, freaked me out to no end; and don't even get me started on having to call the nurse every time I needed to go to the bathroom. Just the knowledge of that stressed me out so much that obviously my bladder went completely berserk on me.:/ So I was basically just lying there, squirming as much as the wires would allow, blinking at the ceiling and wondering how soon I would have to go again. By morning I pretty much felt like I had been run over by a truck. And when the nurse told me that I seemed fine, I honestly didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Yes, I am perfectly fine. I still wake up 2-3 times a night and feel like a wrung-out rag in the mornings. But since the sleep study didn't show obvious signs of apnea or any other disorder, I am not sure I'll be getting any help. They are supposed to call me once a doctor takes a closer look at my results (there was a lengthy questionnaire I had to fill out as well), but there's no telling when that might happen, or what the doctor's further suggestions might be. Another sleep study? Well, I'm afraid they'd have to give me some serious tranquilizers for it to work.:( Psychotherapy?... No thanks, please. I've done enough of that for one lifetime, and I'm pretty sure I'm not depressed or anything right now. I don't have issues with my life, thank you very much. I only wish I could sometimes get more than 4-5 hours of sleep at a time, and feel like I had when I do. That's all. If it doesn't happen anytime soon, I might start feeling depressed, I admit - but that will be the result, not the cause. So I would really appreciate it if someone helped me with the real problem, instead of thinking up fictional ones. But since I am a loser and apparently can't handle the invasion of privacy inherent in a simple medical exam, it is quite likely that they will suspect me of having some mental issues (like anxiety/panic attacks etc.). *sigh*

Well... we shall see. In the meantime, life goes on, it's Thursday night, writing this post took me much longer than it should have, and I need to get ready for bed.:|

Comments

[surreysmum.livejournal.com]

Aw, Floating Leaf. You are *not* a loser, and wait till you hear from the doc, OK, before you decide it was a waste of time? The nice young nurse may just have been trying to reassure you. It's not till they actually take a look at those charts that they decide whether you're breathing properly when you're under, and that's the doctor's call, not the person who was running the test. And yes, I know exactly how it feels to lie there not sleeping most of the night - I've had a test or two like that. Doesn't matter that much - they really do get what they need. Hang on. And keep us posted, OK?

[floatingleaf.livejournal.com]

Thanks for commenting. I just needed a little pat on the head, I guess.;)

But I do think the test wasn't very representative of how I sleep at home, because I always get very tense in unusual situations, and this was one of them. The frequent bathroom trips with all the stuff hanging around my body were pretty traumatic.:/

keep us posted, OK?

Don't think I could stop myself. I just adore harping on about my woes.:P

[romi.livejournal.com]

I am so sorry to hear that the test didn't turn out well. Writing w one hand, so short comment, sorry. hugs!

[floatingleaf.livejournal.com]

Don't be sorry, dear. I really appreciate the fact that you even find the time to read my posts. And just imagining you typing with one hand, while the other arm cradles the Baby, brings a huge smile to my face.<333

[mellacita.livejournal.com]

I totally missed this the first time around.

I wouldn't worry yet. My first sleep study they were supposed to wake me up to put the mask on me if I had apnea, and then they woke me up in the morning when it was over, no mask. The doctor called me a couple of weeks later with the results. Nurses and sleep technicians are not supposed to be allowed to say anything either way. Her saying you were "fine" could have been a very vague, standard reponse.

[floatingleaf.livejournal.com]

Thanks for responding.

they were supposed to wake me up to put the mask on me if I had apnea

That's what I hoped would happen in my case as well, just so that I would know if the mask makes any difference for me. But, of course, it didn't.:(

Nurses and sleep technicians are not supposed to be allowed to say anything either way.

Well, I didn't know that. I guess I expected an instant diagnosis, and that's why I was so tense, and then so disappointed afterwards. Thanks for helping me put things in perspective.:)