Her only possible response to my concerns seems to be: "Why are you being so stubborn?... I only want the best for you." It makes me feel so helpless and tired I usually just give up, so as not to prolong the torment, lol. If I had half the strength of will that she does, it would be a different story - but I don't believe in wasting too much energy on fighting the forces of nature.:P
Well, to be honest, it took me a few years of therapy to deal with standing up to my mother. And to my complete regret, in the end, she died before we could complete the process of separating and becoming close again. I loved her very much, and I still love her, miss her, too - but I had to fight pretty hard to keep my own business in my own hands when she was still alive. The same was true for me with my sisters. I had to close myself off from them pretty long until they finally accepted it when I told them to stay out of my own business. :)
As for wasting energy - forces of nature are one thing, but it is still your life, and you need to be happy with your choices. Which you can only do if they are *your* choices, not hers. In any case, I wish you luck! :)
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Date: 2009-08-30 09:57 pm (UTC)Well, to be honest, it took me a few years of therapy to deal with standing up to my mother. And to my complete regret, in the end, she died before we could complete the process of separating and becoming close again. I loved her very much, and I still love her, miss her, too - but I had to fight pretty hard to keep my own business in my own hands when she was still alive. The same was true for me with my sisters. I had to close myself off from them pretty long until they finally accepted it when I told them to stay out of my own business. :)
As for wasting energy - forces of nature are one thing, but it is still your life, and you need to be happy with your choices. Which you can only do if they are *your* choices, not hers. In any case, I wish you luck! :)