hmmm

[floatingleaf]

Several things happened over the past few days. 1) I talked to a loan officer. 2) I discussed my situation with a friend. 3) I confided via email in another friend, who lives across the big pond and has known me for over 20 years - and she promptly wrote me back. And, as a result of all these conversations, I understood the following:

1) My negative feelings associated with the whole 'buy an apartment' project had nothing to do with the practical or financial side of the matter. They had everything to do with, a) my fear of change, b) my fear of stress and responsibility, c) my strong allergic reaction to my mother and her aggressive 'methods of persuasion', so to speak.

2) It IS, indeed, within my means - with very little help from my parents, if any - to take a loan for a one-bedroom apartment (let alone a studio); if I'm lucky, the monthly fees MIGHT even be lower than my current rent.

3) Once I've had some time to mull this over, I'm not so terribly scared and overwhelmed by it any more. Just a little nervous, frankly. Or very nervous, but in a sort of almost-excited way, lol. I STILL would have preferred to do it at my own pace - but I do realize that the housing prices might not oblige by staying ridiculously low for as long as it takes for me to feel 'ready'.

4) If my mother hadn't been the first/only person who tried to talked me into this, my emotional attitude would have been totally different and I probably would have done it by now.:P

4) I know I'm rationalizing to some extent, now that I've pretty much decided to go on with the plan - but I no longer feel like I'm doing this 'just because my mother said so', and it makes all the difference in the world. Funny that. *sarcastic smirk*


That's it for now. Feel free to sigh and shake your head, dear reader, as you see fit.;P

Comments

[gairid.livejournal.com]

Hey, darlin'.

You are in an odd place. Many people would be pleased to be in a place where they might afford a place they they owned, so immediately you have that OMG WHY ARE YOU COMPLAINNG thing hanging over you.Then there's mom and that whole can o' worms. I get that and nowadays---I really get it.

You are not crazy to do this as long as you know you can afford it. Keep every decision down to it's simplest common denominator. Can I afford this? Yes, Okay. No, Forget it.

I think this seems to be an opportunity. I also think if you can wait 5-6 years (hopefully less) you may be able to sell and move on to where you might want to go. A secure situation is a good one. At some point things will turn around as they always do and if you want to, you you can sell with profit, though in these times patience may be required. You are lucky to have a job right now. I know it's not a given these days and no one knows that better than I do.

Does it matter if your mother has anything to do with i tif it legitimally works? I know I'm not shaking MY head!

You go for it, Fierce Lady. (((hugs)))

[floatingleaf.livejournal.com]

Many people would be pleased to be in a place where they might afford a place they they owned, so immediately you have that OMG WHY ARE YOU COMPLAINNG thing hanging over you.

Yes. The friend I talked to is very envious, because she still lives with her parents, and on top of that has recently lost her job. So she was totally like, OMG girl GO for it!!! And I was like, Um... okay. ;)

Then there's mom and that whole can o' worms.

Hah. It's a Pandora's box, I tell you. *sigh*

Does it matter if your mother has anything to do with i tif it legitimally works?

Precisely. It appears I just realized it doesn't. *nods*

*hugs fiercely back*

[willys-digs.livejournal.com]

Go for it! I think it will be great. Your own little space to do as you please without having to ask for permission. Can't wait to see your journey through this new phase. I wish you all the best sweety!

hugs

Jo

[floatingleaf.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Jo. Even though I pretty much do as I please right now.:P And having 'your own space' also means having to pay for everything yourself (repairs, renovations etc.) instead of just calling the landlord to fix it - and that particular aspect of it might be a problem. But we'll see. Keep your fingers crossed for me.:)

[crowdaughter.livejournal.com]

Well, good for you that you managed to disentangle this mess and come out with a plan and a positive view of the whole business. An apartment of your own *is* a good thing, as long as you can pay the rates and as long as you won't be in danger to lose it and find yourself in a huge debt situation.

Just make sure you sign a contract that has long-term set paying rates, not flexible ones that could go up and leave you unable to pay them. :(

Me, however? I would be scared shitless in your place. If I should not suddenly win in a lottery and be able to pay it at once, I am unlikely to take the risk and buy a flat. Ever.

[floatingleaf.livejournal.com]

An apartment of your own *is* a good thing, as long as you can pay the rates and as long as you won't be in danger to lose it and find yourself in a huge debt situation.

Yes, it is risky, however you look at it. But it seems I have finally arrived at the conclusion that it is actually LESS risky than moving from one rented place to the next and HOPING I can still afford one after I retire. Once you buy, you can refinance to lower the rates in case of lower income, or even postpone paying them for a time if some financial emergency should occur. If you're renting, however, and your landlord suddenly asks you to pay more than you can afford, you just have to move out. And what if you have nowhere to go?... This is what scares me shitless right now.

Besides, up until last week, I didn't realize the prices were THAT low. My friend told me that someone she knows just bought a TWO-BEDROOM flat for $30,000. I only need one bedroom, and the loan officer said I can easily aim for up to $50,000. And of course I'd rather buy something cheaper if I can - unless it requires extensive renovations or something. Also, if I manage to find somewhere close to public transportation, I might be able to save on fuel and keep my car from falling apart for a few more years -which would be a bonus. Anyway, I will not do this unless all the monthly fees combined stay safely under $600 - which I am told is possible. We shall see. Positive thoughts and/or prayers are greatly appreciated.:D

[romi.livejournal.com]

I can understand you only too well. Regarding the feeling of being persuaded, not having made your "own decision". It can be suffocating, infuriating, etc, etc. And it can get you stuck in a place where you don't want to be, or shouldn't be, because you stay there out of sheer stubbornness. I am now only talking about my own situation in regard to some situations, thoughts I got from reading your post.

It has happened to me a few times since I became a mother -- it has given me great opportunity to practice overcoming myself without "selling my soul out". Enough rambling...

I with you all the luck in the world with finding an apartment to buy, to take that leap. We are looking for a new house right this moment, am nervously waiting to hear any opposing bids from other possible buyers of the third house we have seriously looked at and wanted -- it is nerve-wrecking. But luckily, there will always be another house, another opportunity... so I firmly believe.

Enough of my talking. I wish you all the best and hope to be able to follow your possible hunt for a home.
♥

[romi.livejournal.com]

A two bedroom flat for $30,000! That's good news, yes? Will there be other expenses than the interest for you? For instance, here you don't buy the actual apartment -- you buy the right to live in it. The actual owner of the apartment is an owners' association: that is, yourself and the rest of the people who live in the building/buildings that make up the association. And you pay a fee to that association (i.e. to yourself, in a sense).

What are the interest rates you could get right now?
I'm very curious as my whole life circles around buying a new home right now :D

[taelyn-sass.livejournal.com]

Amazing feeling, isn't it? Rationalize it all you like. :D

[floatingleaf.livejournal.com]

It can be suffocating, infuriating, etc, etc. And it can get you stuck in a place where you don't want to be, or shouldn't be, because you stay there out of sheer stubbornness.

Yes. This is the story of my life, basically.;)

I wish you all the best and hope to be able to follow your possible hunt for a home.

Same to you! *tight hugs*

[floatingleaf.livejournal.com]

Heh. I'm afraid I don't know much about interest rates at this point.:) There are various fees involved, including taxes, assessment (which is some sort of maintenance fee, and can include gas and/or heating, for example) and other stuff - but I was told that, for loans up to $50,000, the monthly total of those fees should not exceed $600. Or not by much, anyway. There is also the downpayment (a single-time fee due upon approval of the loan), which would be less than $2,000, and the closing costs (which could be about the same amount) - but it might be possible to avoid the latter, thanks to some government program sponsoring first-time buyers. Or something. I really have a rather vague idea of the whole business right now - once I see an apartment I like, I will be much more interested in all the deails.:)

[floatingleaf.livejournal.com]

Haha. Wisely spoken, sister.;)